Jesus Demotivational Poster
“GO, SELL EVERYTHING YOU HAVE... - ...and give to the poor" (mark 10:21) I´m quite sure he could sell that golden throne at a very good price
THE BACON AND SAUSAGE NATIVITY - Never has tastelessness been so tasty
JESUS FACEPALM - He gave up too so please stop this foolness
YANKEES SUCK - Even Jesus Hates the Yankees Go Red Sox!!!
CHRISTIANITY - Peace Love Acceptance
WHY CAN'T I OWN A CANADIAN -
FAITHPALM - For epic fail of Biblical proportions
JESUS - Cockroaches do have one too.
OW... CUT IT OUT! - You better stop it Thor! I'm tellin my DAD!
ZOIDBERG JESUS - Accept him into your heart
MEAT NATIVITY - Cause nothin' says Christmas more than a pig-in-a-blanket Baby Jesus!
FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER - Unlike Jesus, he comes with garlic bread and marinara sauce.
JESUS SAVES! - Everyone else takes damage.
PROOF OF CREATIONISM? - A Banana Fits in Your Hand But it Also Fits in Your Ass
ATHEISM - Checkmate
PARTY ROCK ANTHEM - So popular, even Jesus is shufflin.
SUPERHERO - Because the real Superhero is the one who saved us.
I AM SORRY... - But you have to die now So that 60 million years from now People will doubt me... Shhhhhhh.
COMIC BOOK JESUS -
SUPER MECHA DEATH CHRIST 2000 - he canceled Beta Support for YOUR SINS!!
NINJAS - Jesus isnt the only one that can walk on water
NEEDED TO BE SAID -
IF YOU'RE JESUS AND YOU KNOW IT - clap your Hands! ... Oh, right.
IF JESUS -
ENLIGHTENMENT - The sudden realization that these two bastards don't really give a damn about you.
LENIN, MICKEY, AND JESUS... - At least the world Mickey created is doing well.
DO-IT-YOURSELF PROJECT - In matters of faith, God has already completed the project. (if it's not broke, don't fix it)
LOVE THY NEIGHBOR -
AND YOU QUESTION GOD - WHY ME? - Always look at the bigger picture.
LISTEN CLOSELY - No more of that Jingle Bells! Y'all better sing Happy Birthday to me, now!
RAPTOR JESUS - doesn't approve of this whole "evolution" fad
HOLLY GHOST - Ghost busted !!
JESUS - Hide and Seek champion of the world.
BIKER JESUS - If they had this guy in front of the church, I might actually go once in a while.
YO JUDAS, YOU IN THERE BRO - I want you to say hello to my little friends ...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS - Party on Matthew, Party on Luke ...
CHRISTIANITY - It's true cuz we can't find his bones
THE BIBLE - ENDORSED BY NON-THINKERS FOR OVER 2000 YEARS. -
FAITH - "Say what you will about the sweet miracle of unquestioning faith. I consider a capacity for it terrifying and absolutely vile." --Kurt Vonnegut
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA - And God Said: "Let There Be America."
RANDY SAVAGE - I'm coming for you Jesus, no rapture on my watch !!!
FACEPALM - What Jesus is doing in heaven when looking at Christianity. Epic Fail.
SO I WAS LIKE ABRAHAM.. YOU SHOULD SACRAFICE YOUR SON - then I was like "Whoa... I was just kidding bro"
NERF JESUS IN THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE! -
ROBOT JESUS - He will reboot for your sins...It might take a few days, though. His software is ANCIENT!
LIVING DEAD -
JESUS LOVES - Re-enacting his favorite scene from TITANIC.
JESUS VS SANTA - There Can Only Be One
JESUS MAY LOVE YOU - But The Rest of Us Think You're a Douchebag
THE MISSING TEEN YEARS -
IT'S NOT OVER YET, KIDS - We still have another 2,000 years of this to go. After all, Nostradamus' last prophecy is after 4000 A.D.
1+1=4 - Consistent With the Rest of Christian Logic
0:2 - At least he was a team player...
The Bible -
WALKING ON WATER - Only for immortals and beings with multiple lives.
RAPTURE JOKES. - Too far.
DEFYING GODS - How to avoid Jesus
DISCO JESUS -
MAY 21, 2011??? - YOU GOT PUNKED
STATISTICS - Wait you are going to tell me that god loves me?
JESUS LOVES YOU - but the Dalai thinks you're a douchebag
ABSTINENCE - ONLY 99.99% EFFECTIVE
JESUS CHRIST - So what if he turned water into wine. I once turned a student loan into Vodka. I bet he can't beat that...
I AM THE WALRUS - Shut the f*ck up, Donny.
DUNKIN DONUTS - Because our children weren't worth it
IN JAPAN - It's not enough to be an atheist. You have to involve robots, too.
SPOILER ALERT! - Jesus dies at the end.
DIVINE INTERVENTION - What about the sour cream?
IT'S FRIDAY - Let's party bitches !
JESUS - ...and to think people worship this abomination
WHO DOESN'T - like a good sing-a-long
LET'S ASK THE MIGHTY GOOGLE ABOUT JESUS. - So much for that...
Jesus Christ -
BLASPHEMY... - It's Jesus Killing A T-Rex With A Sword
HEROS - To many of us, an influential life of a real hero to humanity sounds distant. But then a 15-year-old Pakistani girl takes a stand a proves us wrong. Get well, Malala Yousufzai.
HAPPY HOUR - Because Everyone deserves a break
HEAVEN - Full of Severed Baby Heads
BRB - LOL
JESUS CHRIST - Not only has He returned, He's been causing boat accidents!
HAPPY EASTER - Remember the lessons Easter teaches us: Like always make sure your hippie is dead before we bury him...
JESUS - Just got owned by the forbidden fruit.
JESUS CHRIST - on a bicycle.
GOD-JESUS - Because everyone knows God is a japanese robot
ISLAM - 5 Times a Day Or you Don't Get the 72 Virgins
YOUR SINS - Jesus' eternal healthcare plan covers everything - even those problems you were born with!
1 CORINTHIANS 11:14 - Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears his hair long it is a disgrace to him
CREATIONISM - Seriously people, only a hillbilly believes in this
"GOD LOVES ALL HIS CHILDREN." - I saw what he did to Jesus. I'd rather be put up for adoption.
YOUNG CELEBS -
YOU HAVE 8,355,478 NEW MESSAGES - You have 689,340,534,932 saved messages To listen to your messages, Press 1
AND IF THEY DROWNED JESUS? - Then Christians would pray to this.
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